The Worst Toys Ever!

A collection of the most ill-advised and inappropriate toys from around the world. All of them unbelievably aimed at children!

Whippin “Web Chuck” Spiderman

“Spiderman launches his web chuk smash attack when you squeeze his legs”!

Wonder Woman Scissors

From the Description: “Spread her legs to operate the scissors.”

The Bob-A-Loop

Consists of one end of a pointed stick which you could poke in your eye, and that was attached by a string to a heavy wooden barrel with a hole in it that you could smash into your head.

Baby’s First Baby

Here we have Baby’s First Baby – A pregnant baby doll, whose fetus is also pregnant!
“Real pregnancy action”, is emblazoned across the presentation box, which also includes three milk bottles – one for each generation. The back of the box boasts of “stretch marks! Cravings!”, adding “Waters really break!”

Mickey’s Big Mike

“Put your lips close to Mickey Mouse’s giant microphone for hours of fun and excitement!”

Adolf Hitler Doll

Coming Soon –  “a set of serial killer dolls including Charles Manson, the Hillside Strangler, David Berkowitz aka the Son Of Sam, “Hannibal the Cannibal, and the Chainsaw Massacre guy.”

Superman Snuggler

  1. Stuff
  2. Hug
  3. Play!

Milky the Marvelous Milking Cow

Despite being aimed and marketed at “Under 3’s” –  Milky produced “milk”, that was “toxic” and “not to be drunk, under any conditions

Bump em’ hump em’ Robots

The picture speaks a thousand words..

The Lovely Straight Jacket

From the box “Keep your children’s hands away from your homes beautiful and expensive decoration”

The Funny Cage and The Baby Trap Chair

From the same company who makes the Lovely Straight Jacket. “Don’t Limit your Child’s playing. Limit his space”. Also Available – the Baby Trap Chair… “The end of suffering at meal times”

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